TIME IS NOT EARNED, TIME IS YOURS
“I’ve seen women insist on cleaning everything in the house before they could sit down to write… and you know, it’s a funny thing about house-cleaning… it never comes to an end. Perfect way to stop a woman. A woman must be careful to not allow over-responsibility (or over-respectability) to steal her necessary creative riffs and raptures. She simply must put her foot down and say no to half of what she believes she ‘should be doing’. Art is not meant to be created in stolen moments only.” – Clarissa Pinkola Estes
What Clarissa speaks to in the above quote hits me deeply, as a woman, wife, and mother. I love and take pride in keeping a clean home, in keeping fresh-baked bread on the table, and in caring for my family. Many of us do, and this is one of our many incredible nurturing qualities as women. It’s important to fill our roles, and important to keep a tidy home. But it is not more important than filling our passions, creativity, and time for expression.
Balancing Life’s Responsibilities
Balancing all of life's responsibilities isn’t an easy task for many of us. I am often redefining and recreating what balance looks like for me. For anyone who knows me, I love to cook—I make nearly everything my family eats—and I grow my own vegetables. I have two children and two dogs, who I love to play with and care for. I am a wife, and love caring for my husband. I am also an entrepreneur, creating my business and committed to my passions, working and inspiring women and sisterhood. I am a birthworker at my soul and love to help bring new lives into this world. That’s already a lot, and those are just the main things I love to do. If you add on cleaning, and sweeping, and laundry, and homeschooling, and all of the regular tasks that fall within my roles and responsibilities, it almost sounds unmanageable. And at times it feels that way, but it doesn't have to.
You are Always Deserving of Time for You
I’ve fallen on times where I felt that I had to earn time for my passions. If I didn’t work hard enough, or the house wasn’t clean, I wasn’t deserving of rest, time for writing, or time to start my dream work! To live my dream life! These were such limiting beliefs. I felt guilty if I did anything outside of my role as wife and mother. Because my husband is the provider in my family, I felt I needed to work just as hard in my role as a stay-at-home mom. I am responsible for doing a great job raising my kids and keeping our home, and I'm blessed to be in a position where I am able to stay home and raise my own kids! I wouldn’t have it any other way. But it doesn't mean I have to deny myself my passions and my deep inner creativity; time to sit and sing, to hike and spend time in nature, to create art, to fulfill my passions.
I’ve seen so many of us put our passions on the back burner. At times, I think this is needed and important. When I was postpartum and in my first year or two of mothering, I didn’t have energy for anything but my must-do tasks and breastfeeding, and in those sacred times, it is so important to honor that. But when you hear the inner call for expression, creativity, alone time, don’t silence it for the dishes every time. What is beckoning at your soul to come though? What potential are you bypassing? What healing are you denying? We as women heal through expression and passion.
Top tips on how to claim your time
Be intentional about your time.
Make your desires a priority on your to-do lists.
Don’t be shy to invest in yourself! You are responsible for building yourself from the inside out.
Know that when you fulfill your soul, you fulfill your life.
When you come up with an excuse, replace it with a reason why you will do it.
Follow through. An idea without an action can often leave you feeling unsettled, so either take the idea off your plate for now or stand up and fill that plate with you!
Always remember, there are 24 hours in a day. There is time when you make it!
You’ve got this, sister!
Check out our poetic affirmations titled I Make Time for My Passions, to deepen your practice of claiming your time.
Join us in our free Wednesday Sisterhood Circles for more inspiring conversations about cultivating healthy lifestyles, inner fulfillment, and sovereignty.
